I’m no stranger to spam, believe me. I’ve seen it all. I’m sure many of you think you know what it is to get lots of spam. Pah-SHAW. Coming into work every morning to find 300 new nuggets of joy that have accumulated between the time I went to bed and the time I get to work is just SPECIAL, let me tell you. Anyway, at this point I’m more or less desensetized to it. I’ve gotten this knack for recognizing spam subjects so well, and with such precision, that I can identify an e-mail as spam almost as quickly as it takes me to hit the up arrow repeatedly on the keyboard. There are a few that throw me every so often, but I like to think I’m fairly good at it.
Anyway, when you get such a LARGE volume of spam, you start to take humor in some of the transparently obvious tactics they use to try to get you to believe their spiel, or bypass filters, or whatnot. That addition of random words is obviously aimed at getting past bayesian filters, putting per.iods at od.d p.lace.s in wo.rds is another one, or reverting to basic l33t. But I have to admit, I find it most amusing when I get e-mails like this:
I mean… come on now. I know that tactic would work for something like an @yahoo.com e-mail address or something, but I hold the control panel for @reallifecomics.com. There are a grand total of 5 rlc e-mail addresses. The thought of someone e-mailing me from my OWN DOMAIN just strikes me as funny. Or perhaps, unbeknownst to me, Jessie is an employee of mine that I just never knew I hired. That would make sense why she decided not to introduce herself… of course! It’s HER! Though I doubt any employee of mine would like an active life… oh no. Real Life Comics company policy is that you must stay in your chair at your computer for no less than 35 hours at a shift. Jessie’s in for a rude awakening. As a matter of fact, I may just fire her! Yes! That’s it! Jessie, you’re FIRED! DAMN that felt good. I need someone else to fire. Please, spam company, send me more of these unknown employees so that I may have a constant source of career-ending entertainment!
Turds. If you’re going to waste my time, at least waste it with an offer for male enhancement or mortgage rates or something. At least I can have this little fantasy that somewhere out there is a real mortgage comany just trying to make a buck. :)
Oh, by the by, I’ve been informed by someone in an e-mail today that I complain too much. I just want to let you know that I have realized the error of my ways. I mean, i sure had some nerve writing about my life on my own personal website. Jeez. I suppose there’s some inkling of truth to it… I do tend to post more often when I’m upset or something than when I’m feeling good and happy. I’ll try to come in and post here more often in any case… I want to be uplifting, after all. Just don’t tell me how to post on my own website, though. Then we’ll be all good.
Anyhow, back to comicking. Then I’ve got two weeks worth of Japanese homework to finish in advance so the sensei has it while I’m gone for E3. Oi. My first Japanese final is in two weeks, and I know perhaps 10 of the 60 vocab words for this chapter. Wish me luck. :)
